Community Link host Carolene Mays opens up to advocate for women like herself that have gone through an abusive relationship. Carolene survived physical, mental, and emotional abuse in her previous marriage. She is sharing her story for people to understand the many reasons women are often not able to get out of abusive relationships easily.

The first thing Carolene did to get out of her relationship was standing on her faith.

“I had to really begin to think about and understand, I was created for a purpose and a good purpose, I am beautifully and wonderfully made,” she said.

By standing and thinking about who she truthfully was within, ignoring what her abuser made her believe helped Carolene understand her purpose in this world. Carolene shares with us that one of the abusers’ goals is to isolate the victim from others, so there is no one to reach out to.

“When I realized it wasn’t my fault, that I had nothing to be ashamed of, then I could reach out and start to talk to people,” she said.

One of the biggest things Carolene would like others to understand is not to turn your back on someone who was a victim in an abusive relationship. One of Carolene’s close friends, who she thought she could go talk to, would not return her calls because she was angry Carolene was in this situation.

“I’m hoping that people will stand with those being abused, and know there is much more to it then just saying they shouldn’t be in that situation,” she said. Carolene shares that one loses so much about themselves with abuse, which makes it difficult to walk away.

Carolene strategically started walking away from the marriage, which helped her find her voice. “I said Lord please, please help me, help me get out, give me wisdom to know what to do, and once I’m out what I want to do is reach out and help other women,” she said.

Since being able to leave her abusive relationship, Carolene received clarity on her purpose in this world. Hundreds of women have been able to reach out to Carolene that they have received courage from her to speak out on their abuse.

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233.