Every week, Community Link host Carolene Mays focuses on an organization or individual who is making a positive impact on the community. Her warm and inviting approach has everyone on the show opening up to her. But this time the tables turned. Mays sits down with WISH-TV and reveals a painful memory that still haunts her. 

Mays shares how she experienced domestic violence and abuse in her marriage. She survived physical, mental, and emotional abuse. After more than 20 years, she says there is still trauma from what she went through from her then-husband.

“In my situation with my husband at the time, I was almost killed,” Mays said. “Not only was I was physically abused and beaten, but there was a day when he literally held a gun to my head. He held this gun to my head and said ‘I’m going to kill you, then I’m going to kill myself.’ And I was so broken and beaten down that I was literally at a point where I just didn’t care. I was ready because I wanted out.”

Mays shares how one phone call from her brother saved her life. She soon thereafter realized she needed to get out of the situation and change the narratives she held about herself.

“There is nothing we can do as victims to change our abuser,” she said. “Those are control issues, issues that they have within themselves, and we can’t change them.”

Carolene said that changing her narrative about herself and clearing her head of the negative things about herself helped her to survive and escape.

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic violence, call the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-7233.  

If survivors would like to see the options available in their county, you can visit the “Find Help” tab on the Indiana Coalition Against Domestic Violence: ICADV website and click Domestic Violence Programs. It has a table with almost 45 programs, the counties that they serve and how to directly contact them.